It feels like a knife to the heart when you discover your spouse has been unfaithful. The pain cuts deep. And unfortunately for many Wisconsin residents, that pain only intensifies when they learn about our state’s divorce laws.
Wisconsin is what we call a “no-fault” divorce state. That means neither spouse needs to prove wrongdoing to get divorced. You don’t need to show that your partner cheated or was cruel to you. A simple statement that the marriage is “irretrievably broken” is enough. It also means that their infidelity technically bears no weight in the subsequent negotiations.
But wait – don’t close this tab just yet! While infidelity isn’t required for divorce, that doesn’t mean this serious transgression and breach of trust goes completely unpunished. The reality is more complex. While fault isn’t needed to end your marriage, adultery can still impact various aspects of your divorce proceedings.
In this article, we’ll explore how infidelity might affect property division, alimony, and child custody in Wisconsin. We’ll also discuss what it takes to prove adultery in court and why having an experienced family law attorney matters.
Adultery and Property Division
When you’re getting divorced, you’ll need to divide everything you’ve built together. That includes your home, cars, retirement accounts, and even that pottery collection you started as a couple.
In Wisconsin, we recognize different types of property. There’s marital property (acquired during marriage), non-marital property (owned before marriage or inherited), and commingled property (when the two get mixed together).
Now, Wisconsin is a community property state. That means the court usually splits marital property 50-50, regardless of who caused the divorce. Your spouse’s affair doesn’t automatically mean they’ll lose their fair share.
But there’s a catch, according to Wis. Stat. § 767.61 and the clause on misconduct. Courts can consider adultery when dividing property if it leads to wasting marital assets. A coffee date with a paramour won’t raise any eyebrows. But if your spouse took their lover on a luxury European vacation using joint funds, that’s different. The court might adjust the property division to account for these “dissipated” assets.
Adultery and Alimony
Once again, adultery alone won’t determine alimony payments. Your spouse’s affair doesn’t automatically mean they’ll pay more – or that you’ll be denied support if you were the one who strayed.
Wisconsin courts look at several factors when deciding alimony: how long you were married, each person’s earning capacity, and what you both contributed to the marriage. But infidelity can still play a role.
If the affair impacted the family’s finances or made it harder for one spouse to support themselves, the court might factor that in. For example, if your spouse’s affair partner convinced them to quit their job, leaving you struggling to maintain your lifestyle, the court might consider that when determining support.
Adultery and Child Custody
When it comes to child custody, the rules in Wisconsin are simple. The courts have one priority that towers above everything else – what’s best for your children.
Adultery by itself won’t destroy a parent’s custody rights. The courts won’t punish your ex by taking away time with the kids just because they were unfaithful to you.
But sometimes adultery does matter – especially when it hurts your kids. Let’s say your ex keeps bringing their affair partner to school events, confusing and upsetting your children. That’s when judges start paying attention.
Poor judgment during an affair can really damage a parent’s custody case. Here’s what might concern a judge:
- A new partner with a criminal record or history of violence
- Exposing children to substance abuse
- Skipping important parent duties to spend time with a lover
- Involving children in keeping the affair secret
The number of affairs can sometimes indicate deeper problems. If your ex cycles through multiple partners, brings them all around your kids and shows unstable behavior – that might signal mental health issues that could put your children’s well-being at risk. In extreme cases like these, a judge might limit custody or require supervised visits.
Above all else, remember this: Focus on giving your kids a stable, loving environment. That matters more than any evidence of cheating. Show the court you’re putting your children’s needs first – that’s what really counts.
Proving Adultery
Since adultery can influence divorce proceedings in certain situations, proving it is the only hope you have. The tricky part is that you need solid evidence.
Wisconsin law uses what’s called a “preponderance of the evidence” standard. In simple terms, you need to show it’s more likely than not that the adultery occurred and affected your family.
Admissions
Sometimes, your spouse might admit to the affair. This could happen in conversations, text messages, or emails. While rare, these direct admissions are powerful evidence. For instance, a text message saying, “I’m sorry I cheated,” is pretty clear evidence that can be used in court.
Witness testimony
People who saw your spouse with their affair partner can testify in court. This might include friends, family members, or even private investigators. Say a neighbor regularly saw your spouse’s car parked overnight at someone else’s house during business trips you thought they were taking. That testimony could help prove adultery.
Circumstantial evidence
This includes indirect proof like:
- Hotel receipts
- Credit card statements showing romantic dinners
- Inappropriate emails or text messages
- Photos from social media
For instance, credit card statements showing your spouse bought jewelry you never received might raise questions about where those gifts went.
The Role of a Family Law Attorney
We won’t sugarcoat it – the odds aren’t in your favor if you’re hoping to use adultery as a major factor in your divorce. Wisconsin courts have been clear about not considering adultery as grounds for divorce.
But here’s something that might surprise you. Wisconsin law actually lists adultery as a Class I felony! Mind you, it is rarely ever enforced, but talk about mixed messages from our legal system. It just shows you how complicated these cases can get.
That’s exactly why you need a skilled family law attorney in your corner. Think about it – gathering evidence isn’t like it used to be. These days, we’re dealing with text messages, social media posts, digital bank records, and more. You need someone who knows exactly what to look for and how to present it effectively in court.
Speaking of court, it becomes even more important if your ex-spouse shows up with their own legal counsel. A family law attorney can protect your rights during negotiations and ensure you get a fair settlement in the end.
Conclusion
While dealing with infidelity is heartbreaking, you can get through this. Focus on building your new future rather than dwelling on past betrayals. Remember – Wisconsin’s laws might not punish adultery directly, but there are still ways to protect your interests when infidelity has harmed your family’s well-being.
The key is understanding how adultery might affect your specific situation. That’s where we come in. At Vanden Heuvel & Dineen, S.C., we’ve helped countless Wisconsin residents navigate divorce proceedings involving infidelity.
If you’re ready to discuss this delicate situation, contact us for a free consultation. For more information about divorce in Wisconsin, visit:
Wisconsin State Bar: https://www.wisbar.org/
Wisconsin Court System: https://www.wicourts.gov/
